THE HUSBAND’S MANDATE
So, when this perfectly designed, and Divinely given woman becomes our wife, we have a very high calling. Paul clearly tells all husbands that they are to love their wives “just as Christ also loved the church,” we must ask, “How does Jesus love us?” We know from Scripture that:
o Christ’s love has no conditions (Rom. 5:8).
o Christ’s love is focused upon us (Deut. 7:7; Eph. 1:6,7).
o Christ’s love is strong and giving (John 13:1; Eph. 5: 2, 25).
o Christ’s love never ends (John 13:1; Jer. 31:3; Rom. 8:39).
o Christ’s love is not selfish (Phil. 2:6, 7).
o Christ’s love is sacrificing (Eph. 5:2, 24; Gal. 2:20; 1 Pet. 3:18; Rom. 5:6-11; 1 Pet. 2:24).
o Christ’s love is expressed in ways we can know (John 10:1-14; 14:1-3; 13:34,35; 15:9-10; Rom. 8:32; Phil. 4:13, 19; Heb. 4:14-16).
Since God wants us to love our wives with Christ’s love, where do we start? Here are just a few ideas of some little choices to reorder our priorities, that will make us increasingly Christlike in our love for our wives.
1. Christlike husbands seek His HUMILITY.
2. Christlike husbands seek His SERVANTHOOD
3. Christlike husbands seek His KIND WORDS.
4. Christlike husbands seek His KIND DEEDS. A husband who believes his primary ministry is marriage will love his wife by providing for the satisfaction of her varying needs. Matthew 20:28
5. Christlike husbands seek His CLOSENESS. A husband who believes his primary ministry is marriage will want to spend his most vital commodity (time) with his most precious possession (his wife). We love our wife by being near her and protecting her (Eph. 5:28).
6. Christlike husbands seek His HELPFULNESS. A husband who believes his primary ministry is marriage will express love to his wife by assisting her to fulfill her chores and responsibilities. 1 Peter 5:3
7. Christlike husbands seek His SACRIFICE. A husband who believes his primary ministry is marriage will express his love by sacrificing his interests and desires for hers (Eph. 5:25; Phil 2:5-6).
8. Christlike husbands seek His SHARING. A husband who believes his primary ministry is marriage will love his wife by allowing her really to share the deepest parts of his life (1 Pet. 3:7-“heirs together of the grace of life”).
9. Christlike husbands seek His LOYALTY. A husband who believes his primary ministry is marriage will express his love by refusing to compare her unfavorably with other people, especially other women (I Cor. 13:4-8).
10. Christlike husbands seek His FOCUS. A husband who believes his primary ministry is marriage will express his love by demonstrating to his wife that, apart from your relationship to Jesus Christ, SHE has first place in your life. She is the singular target of our focused eyes (Matthew 6:22).
11. Christlike husbands seek His TENDERNESS. A husband who believes his primary ministry is marriage will express his love by giving her a lot of tenderness, respect, chivalry, and courtesy (Eh. 5:28; Col. 3:19; 1 Cor. 13:4, 5). Do not use jokes about her or make cutting remarks to her in front of other people. Speak to her in a gentle and respectful way. Treat her as you would a valuable jewel rather than a piece of cinder or a garbage can.
12. Christlike husbands seek the priority of PRAISING HER. A husband who believes his primary ministry is marriage will love her by expressing appreciation and praise generously and in large doses (1 Pet. 3:7; Prov. 31:28).
Getting Back On Track
Each of us husbands need to seriously examine whether we have the priorities that reflect Christ’s love. Remember them?