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1. LEAD HER: A discipling husband gives the stability and direction of a spiritual leader.
2. NEED HER: A discipling husband tells his wife she is meeting vital needs in his life and work that no other woman can meet.
3. CHERISH HER: A discipling husband allows his wife to see and hear that he cherishes her and delights in her as a person.
4. PROTECT HER: A discipling husband shows that he understands his wife by protecting her in areas of limitations.
5. NOTICE HER: A discipling husband enjoys setting quality time aside for intimate conversation with his wife so she knows that he is aware of her presence even when his mind is on other matters.
6. SACRIFICE FOR HER: A discipling husband is willing to serve his wife in encouraging and regular ways.
7. WASH HER: A discipling husband can be heard reading the Word of God to his wife. He is the one who initiates God’s Word into the cycle of daily life.

One final and vital aspect of marriage: intimacy. And that is the key to sex. Let’s get to work here and note a passage to discuss: Deut. 24:5 – newlywed verse “cheer up”, discover how to please her.

As Dr. William S. Appleton has pointed out, “It is essential to remember that marital dullness is not confined to middle and later years; indeed it can and does occur in the first year of marriage.”

Certainly, an emotionally flat, chronically dull marriage signals the need for positive steps toward building intimacy, injecting new life into the relationship. Recently a young husband said to me with a note of despair, “My wife and I have already lost touch with each other.” It was a graphic description of their lack of intimacy, for to experience intimacy is to touch–emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually.

Here are some of the strands that make up the bond of intimacy between a husband and wife. They are given in no particular order, and you may have others of your own to add.

– Physical touching of an affectionate, nature
– Shared feelings
– Closeness and open communication and honesty
– Intellectual agreement on major issues
– Spiritual harmony
– Sensitive appreciation of the mate’s physical and emotional responses
– Similar values held
– Imparted secrets
– Genuine understanding